The Death Pool – UFO Sightings Over Traverse City And North Stars Disappear


Looks like the UFO activity is picking up again.  Crazy how teams just up an disappear when this shit happens.  First we had reports of Northern Lights being seen in Michigan.  That’s really not that unusual though cause they do have Northern Lights from time to time.

Turns out its those pesky UFO’s again.  And I’ll be damned if all those things do is pick up Tier III teams never to be seen again.  Seriously spooky shit if you ask me.

I mean if you are a Tier III team, you got to be a little nervous right now.  Only six weeks away from training camps opening and teams are starting to disappear!

Oh I know, the local news said they were going “dormant”.  Yeah well not so much.  See league rules don’t allow for teams to go dormant.  No such thing as dormancy in the USPHL.  So if you say going dormant, you may as well say going dark.  Cause there aint no coming back from that abyss.

The timing of this is almost as awesome as the disappearance itself.  I mean how great is it that just before the season starts, you simply disappear.  Yep, even if you could go dormant, I don’t think your league partners would be taking that very well if you tried to come back.

Yep, the middle of July.  Rumors are swirling about almost every pay to play league in North America.

We got teams reporting with six or seven players in mid July.  Yeah, ummmmm news flash for you guys.  If you don’t have fifteen to eighteen by now, you are screwed.  Yep, no sense in sending any mixed messages.

If you’re being recruited by a team that cant name fifteen players that are signed then you need to walk away.  If you don’t, you got no one to blame but yourself when they fold and screw you.

Ohhhhh shit, don’t want to forget all the shit shows who are signing all those 2001 birth year midget players.  Yeah, all you donkeys are going to be exposed.  Loading up on Midgets and telling them your shit show is better for their development.  Seriously, how can you sleep at night?

On a positive note, the USA Hockey is attempting to mandate that a new Phase III Draft take place at the Tier I level in 2018.  The Phase III draft will be exclusively for players at the Tier III level.  This draft will take place on the second Tuesday in the first week of NEVER!  Ha Ha Ha

David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You

*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events.  It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.