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The Death Pool – Special Report – GMHL Facebook Stalkers Or Recruiters?

Happy Wednesday my little death cherubs!  Oh yeah, its me, little old Death comin at ya to let you know about a little Facebook stalking, ummmmm recruiting, yeah recruiting that’s what it is.  Well, I am not letting you know about it, I am giving you a heads up to run like hell if you’re a player and it happens to you!

So here’s the deal, the Greater Metro Hockey League, of GMHL as its so lovingly known as, is a NON SANCTIONED LEAGUE!!!!  Read that kids.  Non Sanctioned.  You know, kind of like Donald Trumps bullshit real estate school was not accredited!  You know like the one old Trump baby is getting his ass sued off for now for ripping off students with false promises.  Yeah, now you might get what I am talking about.

So, when your the GMHL which is a league that is on the outside of legitimate hockey trying to look in, what do you do when real players tell you to pound sand when you try to recruit them?

Well kids, you resort to Facebook stalking errrr, recruiting.

That’s right, you get a message from some douchebag you never heard of from a team you never heard of talking about how they live in hockey utopia!  Yep, everyone goes to college or turns pro from the league.  Yep, players are treated first class and they get the best of everything!

Ummmmm yeah.  I got news for ya kids, first class organizations don’t need to recruit on Facebook.  Clowns and amateurs recruit on Facebook.  Sometimes amateur clowns use Facebook too, but we got nothing against people in the clown profession.  These guys aren’t even good enough to be professional clowns!

True story…….

A USPHL team gets eliminated from the playoffs.  Within hours, some douche is Facebook messaging all the players from that team trying to get them to the GMHL!!!

As if any player is dumb enough to leave a legitimate sanctioned hockey league to go to a shit show!  Yep, I am going to trade you my Corvette for your Prius!  That makes a whole lot of sense eh kids?!

The more I hear about this outlier league, the less I can even look at it as a league.  Its no wonder so many teams fold every year.  The operations manual must be written on used toilet paper.

Speaking of teams folding, it looks like the GMHL wont even make it to the start of the 2016 season before bad news comes.  Yep, word on the street is teams are leaving to form one new league and possibly two!  Hell yeah boys, run like your life depends on it!

Thanks to the GMHL.  Seriously, I want to thank them.  Without them, it would have been a pretty slow news period the last month or so.  Without you morons I would have had to really work for my paycheck.  And you know, that would have meant contacting people on Facebook to dig shit up on you GMHL boys!

Hey kids, see ya real soon.  We got a half dozen ass kickers in the works!

David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You

*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events.  It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening

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