The Death Pool – Special Report – GMHL’s Orangeville Bud Pickers Fold Up Like A Tent
Ahhhhhh yes, here we are a few weeks into the new year, and we have a new shit show folding up shop. Life is great when it imitates death isn’t it? Ha Ha Ha
Someone up in Orangeville Ontario musta run out of dope to pick, or sell, or not sell, or smoke, or “its all for personal use officer”! Ha Ha Ha It feels like it was just yesterday that this shit show team was being funded by a dope operation. Oh shit, its almost two months to the day that the team owners were busted and the league came out and said there was nothing to see and it would all be fine! Oh well sometimes a few months just fly by I guess.
Turns out, it looks like the dope operation was actually funding this shitty team. Seriously because they just up and vanished into that ever present Bermuda freakin triangle like hole that follows the G Show! Boom another one vanishes under mysterious circumstances.
Well not so mysterious really. It was a god damn joke that what Orangeville was. Yeah, like a name change from the Orangeville Americans was going to fix anything!
Who was the freakin brain surgeon who came up with the name “Orangeville Americans” anyway? Just a clue you morons, the team was located in Canada, not America, so you might want to take a remedial geography class.
So, lets just change the name to Ice Crushers to cover up all the other bullshit that went on. No one will figure that out! Ha Ha Ha Seriously has anyone in the G Show even read a book on branding? My niece could do better than these ass clowns and she is 7!
Oh no, what will happen now to all those great expansion plans? You think cities might rethink giving a lease to these idiots? Not a chance. Cities are so desperate to sell ice they will sign a lease with people that clearly cant afford to own a team. But hey they tried right?
The G Show. Its a special place. Its one hot item that’s for sure. Well if you consider Chernobyl a hot item too! Ha Ha Ha The G Show probably has more victims than Chernobyl! Seriously who the hell is going to play for this merry band dummies?
Stick around kids, the spring thaw is right around the corner, and you know what happens in spring? All the beautiful new start up teams blossom into the thorny little pricks that they really are. 2017 is shaping up to be reall good, and I would like to thank The Death Pool chief sponsor the G Show. Well, they should sponsor it anyway, they get more coverage from me than they do their own local papers!
David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You
*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.