The Death Pool – Boom Boom Boom Another One Bites The Dust
Hey kids! I hope everyone had as good a Halloween as I did! It was like getting served sauce on the tape for one timers to an open net all weekend long! Met me some nice little death cherubs at a costume party as well, but that’s a whole other story! Ha Ha Ha
So yeah, we got us another casualty. This time another teams north of the border up on good old Prince Edward Island.
The feathers have been plucked off of the wings of the Souris Hawks after the two-year-old team ceased operations in the P.E.I. Junior C Hockey League late last week. Yep, some locals are saying the Hawks were set free to fly in the middle of a duck hunting preserve and that probably wasn’t such a good idea! Ha Ha Ha
Seriously though, with three Junior C teams, made up of mostly local players, coming out of one small county in PEI, there is no wonder a team folded! Who is the freaking moron who added more expansion teams to this league this year anyway?! Clearly not someone who knows what they are doing or reads TJHN to actually find out whats going on the junior hockey world.
Probably the same idiot who is in charge of league statistics is the one in charge of expansion. Game results and player statistics from the three games the Souris Hawks played have been deleted from the league website. Yep, nothing quite like screwing a kid out of his stats boys!
The remaining six teams will play a 28-game regular season. Sounds like a real balanced schedule there kids. 28 games? Are you kidding me? And you want to call that Junior Hockey? Sounds more like High School to me.
But hey, its no wonder why you experienced a player shortage there boys. With such a full schedule, and all those close competitive games, why wouldn’t a player want to play in the league?
Now for those of you interested, the PEI league is now offering discounted franchises in Dubai as they seek to expand their footprint and relocate their winter offices to just a little warmer climate. Synthetic ice will be used in the Dubai division as it is more cost effective, and team travel will be provided by Camel as a cost savings measure. Who wants he front hump?! Ha Ha Ha
*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.