Oh yeah, its another beautiful Monday morning. I got the coffee going, doing a little research on some teams who don’t pay their coaches, some teams that don’t follow Hockey Canada rules regarding players, and laughing my ass off at some shit I found on message boards over the weekend.
Hey mommies and daddies, you players too. Time to pull your heads out of your asses and start paying attention.
Why the hell would you go on to an anonymous website, message board, and ask career advice from people you don’t know? Why would you put your career or future in the hands of people who may want to sabotage your career if you are competing with them or their kids for the same spot?
Why would you seek advice from someone who literally has zero experience in hockey other than watching it?
I found some messed up shit out there. Yep, like someone actually telling a kid to go to the WSHL because its better than the AAA Tier 1 Elite league. Priceless.
Or, “You got to get your name out there. Go to a bunch of camps and get noticed.” In response to a AA level player asking where he should go for NCAA D-1 exposure.
Then there was this beauty, “Go up to Canada, the BCHL or OJHL and you will get great exposure.” In response to a 16 year old American player! No shit. This is what is out there.
So in case all you mommies and daddies didn’t know, if you’re an American kid, you cant go play in Canada until you are 18. Its a rule. Apparently the message board donkey didn’t know the rules. Oh, hmmmm you think that might be an issue?
Seriously everyone, its time to get your shit together. Stop falling for every line, and stop falling for bullshit promises.
But hey, if you have a credit card with a high limit, you can choose to ignore all the advice here on TJHN and go spend the $6500 a summer average that other people will spend chasing useless camps like drug addicts. Yep, got to chase that high because the coach said he just needs to “see more” of me.
In another story, there is a rumor out there now that another new pay to play league will be forming on the South Pole. In an effort to expand the game, while reducing ice costs, this joint venture between the Penguin and Walrus Ice Hockey Associations is sure to be a big hit. Billeting is an issue, but a plan for condominium igloo’s is also in the works.
David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You
*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.
