Featured General News The Death Pool TJHN Originals

The Death Pool – Seguin Huskies Shot Out Back Behind the Barn

Oh spring is in the air…… What a beautiful time of year. Flowers blooming, grass growing, and trees green. The smell of new life is in the air! Unfortunately, up in the GMHL, it is the rancid smell of rotting corpses of dead hockey teams that is wafting in the air, now uncovered from the receding snow. It seems, just like Old Yeller, the Seguin Huskies were taken out back, and put out of their misery.

Now, I know you are all going to roll your eyes, and say, “Geez…Another article about how terrible the GMHL is, and how they scam players for money….Come on!!!” And you’re bang on the nose! Here at the Junior Hockey News, we’d love to tell more stories from other leagues, and trust me, we’re just as sick of these bunch of money grabbers as you are. However, this GMHL is like the perennials in your mom’s tulip garden. Every spring, there’re up again.

The Seguin Huskies are owned by the same owner as the Parry Sound Islanders, who folded last season, and the Kingsville Kings. Out of 3 teams this guy owns, in 2 years, 2 of his teams are dead. Is Kingsville next??? All depends on how many truly stupid players and parents there are out there to pay money to this GMHL shit show league. Is the saying, “There’s a new sucker born every minute.” true? That’s the GMHL motto.

In a related story, Robert Turnbull of the Toronto Predators is now also working with the Wiarton Schooners. This guy can’t even put together one decent team, now he thinks he can do 2!!! Good thinking, genius! Goes to show, if there’s a buck to be made scamming players, or bilking the elderly, every GMHL shmuck’ll be in the loot. We also got a player report this guy’s following the typical GMHL scam of telemarketing players, not seeing them play, nor caring as long as they got a check book from their parents.

Then the donkey is bashing the North York Renegades, who share the same rink as them, (that right, 2 junior teams, in the same league, sharing the same rink! GONGGGGGG!) by lying, and telling the player not to sign with North York because they’re going to fold, just like the Toronto Attack did. The owner of the North York Renegades owns the biggest towing company in Toronto. This guy could spend more money with a night out with the boys than it takes to buy the entire league. That team WILL NOT fold, unless the owner wants it to….And he doesn’t want it to.

So for you shit show operating, cash grabbing, hockey career ruining teams, and unscrupulous owners like Robert Turnbull that will say anything to get money out of players, here’s a GIANT F-YOU middle finger up from everyone in the hockey world. You are what’s wrong with hockey, and the worst of human decency. We will be right here to report about your 5th straight losing season again (never had a winning season in team history) this year again. But it isn’t about the hockey or development for you is it? It’s all about the money.

~ Peter Northgraves

*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. Unfortunately for the GMHL its not too funny for them. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.

Related posts

2021-22 USHL Players of the Week – Clark Cup Playoffs First Round


Pre Draft Combine Player Profile – Teddy Bunton


Jets, Titans win on Tuesday