The Death Pool – Special Report – Have You Seen This Donkey Errrrr I Meant Adviser – Publishers Edition

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Unfortunately, we have been getting a whole lot of emails on advisers, or advisors these last few weeks.  Its amazing what some of you people are calling an adviser.  Apparently, some of you are willing to believe anything someone says, until you find out you shouldn’t have believed a single thing that person said.

Have you ever heard things like, “NCAA scouts are all over teams in Washington State”, or “The WHL will take you in the import draft from the WSHL”, or the all time classic “I know what it takes to get to NCAA hockey” even though I have never gotten a player there!  Just classic crap that some of you are buying.

So have you seen this Jack Ass, errrrrr Donkey, ummmmm Adviser….

heisler

Unfortunately for some of you, you don’t find out you hired a Donkey until its too late.  So here are a few clues that will help you see if you hired a Donkey or a professional Adviser……

My adviser has me on my third, fourth or fifth team this season and my he cant explain why he keeps having me switch teams.  You got yourself a world class Donkey there.

My adviser told me to go to a “pay to play league” because a Major Junior team wanted to see me play there, but I have not heard from the Major Junior team all year.  You have hired not only a Donkey but a Donkey that is dumber than the average Donkey.

My adviser doesn’t have any NCAA placements, but says he can get me there.  You have hired the classic Donkey who actually has a narcissistic personality disorder.

My adviser always asks me to promote his services to other players on my team.  You have hired a Donkey who clearly isn’t good enough on his own reputation of moving kids to NCAA hockey that clients just come to him.

My adviser has several of his clients competing for ice time at the same position, on the same team and we still cant win.  You have hired a Donkey who other teams wont deal with or your Donkey is receiving a kickback from the team you are paying to play on.

My adviser publicizes every new signing but has never publicized a player moving on to NCAA hockey.  You have hired a donkey who doesn’t even know NCAA rules and is risking your eligibility.

My adviser put me in a league and called it Tier II then moved another player from my league to another Tier II league and called it a promotion.  You have hired a Donkey that spews so much crap that he cant remember what he has said to people.

Yes, these are some basic things to notice about a Donkey pretending to be an adviser.

See the problem with buying a K-Mart level product is you cant expect to receive Saks Fifth Avenue quality and service from K-Mart.  Try going to buy a Filet and Lobster tail at McDonalds and see what you get on your plate!

Now if you are just figuring out you hired a Donkey, or The King of All Donkey’s, and not a real professional adviser, its ok.  You can always fire the Donkey and talk to a real professional adviser.

A real professional adviser will talk to you and tell you the truth.  He will tell you if you even need an adviser.  A professional adviser is not in the business to make quick cash or sign as many clients as possible.  A professional adviser is like an attorney, and the best attorneys don’t take cases they think they will lose, they take winning cases.

While many of you may be disappointed with the humor level in todays Death Pool, it was not intended to be completely funny.  Its a rather serious subject.

Simply stated, there are far too many people out there pretending to be advisers who simply do not have the experience, or education to wear the title of Adviser.

Then again any Donkey can call himself an expert if he watches enough games on the internet these days I guess.

Thanks for reading, and I am looking forward to that call from one very special Donkey complaining that this was about him.  Funny thing is, the Donkeys that call me to complain will all be right.

Joseph Kolodziej – Publisher and Donkey Hater