The Death Pool – Special Report – Alaskan Disaster
Yea though I walk through the shadow of myself, I shall not fear myself! Ha Ha Ha Hell yeah boys and girls, its another beautiful Wednesday morning when you all get to read this. Sipping your coffee and snackin on doughnuts. No better way to start hump day than with a little dose of the Death Pool. Thanks for starting your day with me, I really appreciate it.
So, lets hear it for Alaska. (insert chirping cricket noises here)
Yeah, so Alaskan hockey is on its death bed. Not that kids aren’t playing, and there are some really good ones up there. But hockey as a business in Alaska is dying. No other way to put it.
First, NCAA hockey threatens to get axed due to declining oil revenues, and then the Alaska Aces in the ECHL folded last week. Yeah, the once proud and strong franchise is now stinkin up the morgue. Never thought that would happen.
And now, the Kenai River Brown Bears are done. Yep, the NAHL’s version of a Saturday Night Live skit is finally getting killed off and probably moved to Wisconsin. Yep, because Wisconsin franchises are all raking in the cheddar! Ha Ha Ha
Seriously, this franchise should have been done in Alaska a few years ago. If not for Fairbanks paying for its survival it wouldn’t have existed anyway. Oh shit, sorry, you didn’t know that Fairbanks was paying the bills for Kenai? ooooops
You have to ask yourself how a free to play team in one of the top leagues in the world cant be competitive? Seriously. With all the good players being moved up to the NAHL from other Tier III teams, why cant Kenai become better?
So now, what does Fairbanks do? Yeah, you know, since you now don’t even have a single travel partner. Can anybody say “use some common sense”? Go to the BCHL boys, it really just makes a lot more sense.
How about those NAHL road trips now?!?!?! Fairbanks to Minnesota flight? Five easy hours. Yep and that’s your closest road trip.
The good news for Fairbanks? Frequent flyer miles are just piling up next season.
On another note, the NAHL may be receiving expansion applications from Dawson Creek BC., Detroit Michigan, and Chicago Illinois. Oh never mind, that really wasn’t funny. My apologies. Those still sting a little bit?
David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You
*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.