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The Death Pool – Its Not Junior Hockey When ….

As we wind down the 2021-2022 season, all kinds of new and fun stories begin to be told about what happened during the season and playoffs. The emails, only some of which are suitable for talking about, are simply legendary. So, without further delay….

It is not junior hockey when;

Your Tier 3 coach who just happens to be the team owner and notorious gambler, starts offering some discounts for players who decide to sign with the team for next season. When committing to return to the team the coach then asks your parents to send the deposit via electronic application or Western Union so he can get the cash while he is on vacation in Las Vegas. Stranger still, he asks every other player to send cash to him in Vegas as well.

It is not junior hockey when;

At the end of the season, you go for one last team practice only to find the dressing room locks have been changed and your equipment is locked in the room because the owners have not paid the ice bill for the last two months.

It is not junior hockey when;

After getting your asses kicked all season long, carrying a roster of 30 paying players, your owner re-signs eight players who regularly did not play, sitting in the stands, and immediately heads off on vacation to Europe.

It is not junior hockey when;

At the end of the season team party at the “hockey house” the assistant coach on your “junior team” decides to get drunk and sleep with an under age girl who just happens to be one of the owners daughters. The owner then not only finds out about the party and the sexual activity, but fires the assistant coach who in turn files a complaint about being fired with the “league”. The “league” then actually asks the owner to “reconsider” the firing.

It is not junior hockey when;

You begin getting over loaded with emails inviting you to pre-draft camps, and main camps in less than 24 hours after the conclusion of a “league event’, where you “played great” “exceeded expectations” and “really surprised people”. Yet, although registered and paid, you didn’t play in that event because of an injury the week before.

It is not junior hockey when;

At the end of the season at the team dinner hosted by the coach, alcohol is not only allowed, but the coach participates in playing beer pong while bragging about how when he was in college playing D1 that he would regularly kick everyone’s ass at beer pong. At which time players begin asking him why his pro career did not turn out so well.

It is not junior hockey when;

When the season ended, and marketing began for the 2022-2023 season, you were emailed a brochure talking about all the great changes that were coming for next season. When you compare it to last seasons recruiting brochure you find that the only thing that is changed in the great new changes coming are the season dates changing from 2021-2022 to 2022-2023.

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