Happy Monday morning kids. I hope everyone had as nice of a weekend as I did. Just chilling by the Intensive Care Unit drinking coffee and waiting for teams to finally do the right thing and pull the plug on themselves.
But nooooo we cant have that can we? Cant expect these team owners who have shit for players on their rosters to do whats right by those players and simply fold up shop. Nope, these greedy morons are willing to go right up to the very last minute before folding up shop.
So, lets just call out some deceivers shall we?
Lets hear it for the NA3EHL deceivers that have less than ten players signed. There is more than one of them too. Don’t believe it? We have the email from one GM saying they need help because they have 9 players signed and 3 of them are goalies! Yep, you might just want to check with a team you’re signed with kids cause there are a few teams that have no chance.
How about the Rocky Mountain Junior League? A brilliant idea that has zero execution, and close to that chance of success. Considering 4 out of 6 teams couldn’t put even close to a roster on the ice now, you would think these boys would know they have as much chance at success as the snowball in hell.
Lets also not forget the NA3HL. Yep, the cough cough direct pipeline to the NAHL cough cough. Such a beauty when multiple teams are reporting they might get to 15 players. Now that is a recipe for success kids.
Hmmmmmmm ohhhhh yeah, in case you missed it, the USPHL Mid West is thinning out the heard. With three teams already folding, two more cant play a game today. Oh yeah, but hey, one of them has 15 players signed including 3 goalies but they say they are good. One team has 10 or 8 depending on who you believe, and they are willing to go to next month before folding! Yep, that’s a person I want to do business with.
Lets not forget my friends in Canada kids. The GMHL has at least two more teams that are having a hard time finding enough import players to carry the Vodka bottles to practice. Ha Ha Ha Seriously folks, just water in those bottles.
Right about now the WSHL thought they were getting off the hook. Nope, we know you got some serious issues too. Yep, and it will be awesome when we can write about all those kids who were promised NCAA D-1 deals if they came to your league and didn’t get them. We got those emails too. Should probably keep a better handle on the bullshit some coaches like to use in recruiting boys.
Staying out west, lets not forget the NPHL. The little engine that could. Two teams in trouble there kids. The fact this league even exists any more is remarkable. Seriously, it not even in the same realm of talent and development as the other Tier III teams.
Do the homework yourself kids. Its easy enough to figure out who is in trouble. No player signing announcements might be one clue. No camp reports might be another. But sooner or later this will all come out in The Death Pool. Stay tuned kids, I just heard a machine flat line and I need to check things out.
*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events. It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening.