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The Death Pool – Teams, Parents And Players Caught Lying

What a weekend!  I am really enjoying going to these big events now.  Starting to get the scouting part of this down pretty good.  Looking back through my notes, grades and projections at players I have watched over the last few years, some are on target while some are not.  Crazy how things change from Bantam to Midget to Junior.

Even crazier is when people think they wont get caught lying!  Oh you all know we are going to hear about the teams that get caught selling the bullshit stories and not delivering.  That’s the easy part.  Hell, I got sixty new leads to work on in one day when we announced The Black List as a new feature!

But lets not forget all the great lies being told by parents and payers here.  Oh yeah, you know who you are.  What you don’t know is that most of you have been caught doing it!

So a goalie is going to several tryouts.  One of the teams is real close to home so he is there all the time right?  Another is a hour and a half away, so he only goes twice a week for summer skates.  The team close to home offers him a spot and he takes it.  Then the team further away offers him a spot and he takes it too!

Priceless situation here!  So, one day the kid shows up at one teams skate wearing the other teams colors on his new set of gear!  Hey dumbass, you just got busted!  When asked about it, the kid and the parent lie and say its just a coincidence!

It didn’t take more than a phone call from one coach to the other to find out the kid and the parent were playing both teams for ice time.  Yep, well, now the kid and parent aren’t even welcome in one teams building.  And don’t think for a second the boys wont remember what happened during the season when the two teams play each other!

Another kid signs up for a camp.  He changes his mind later after getting an invite to another camp.  Not a big deal, everyone changes their minds.  But because he doesn’t have the balls, and neither do his parents, they cancel attending one camp saying they “cant afford to go” but are then announced as signing a Tier III contract that charges almost ten grand a year!

One player registers for one team camp, then registers for another team camp, and then registers for a third team camp all on the same weekend!  Dad cancels the first camp by saying there has been a death in the family, then cancels the second one saying there was high school graduation.  When three coaches sit down the weekend before their camps at another event, the name is discussed by between all three coaches!  Guess what boys?  Busted, and because Daddy was lying, the third team cancelled the kids camp offer!

See, as much as parents and players talk, coaches talk too.  As much as teams bullshit you guys, many of you are doing the same to them.

You know what the difference is?  If a team lies to you, you can keep one or two of your buddies from going to a camp or signing with them.  If you get caught lying to someone who is connected, word will spread fast.

Just be up front.  If you want to do something else after registering for a camp, just tell them you took another opportunity.  One coach will be pissed for a minute, but he will never call you a liar.  Seriously, if you think coaches don’t talk, you are crazy.

Every little thing comes into play when you are looking to move up in Junior Hockey.  The way you carry yourself on the ice, the way you talk, the way you compete, and your attitude.  Get caught lying and that’s a big strike against you.  If your parent gets caught lying for you, its an even bigger strike!

Oh yeah I know, everyone is saying how unfair this is because teams don’t get in trouble for lying.  Yeah well if they get caught here they do.  And if they don’t, that’s just life and lifes not fair.  You need a team to play for and they run the team.

Hey kids, don’t forget, June 1st is the official start of silly season.  You know, when teams start folding, and all hell breaks loose.  Well, it might just come a little early this year because I am already getting info on a few teams.  Yep, just like getting to open a present on Christmas Eve, things might just come early this year!

David Wagner – The Angel Of Death – For Those Who Live Stupidly I salute You

*The Death Pool is a mix of comedy, and satire in connection with recent events.  It is not an official report of current events although it may look as though the news is so accurate that it could one day happen or may be happening

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